Brett and I made a 9 hour road trip yesterday. It felt incredibly longer than nine hours. It was an unusually quiet drive. Aspen, the child who never sleeps even on a 12 hour road trip, was recovering from the flu and slept for several hours in the back seat. I had the flu and Brett was thinking deep thoughts as he drove. We usually don’t lack for conversation, but due to the circumstances it was quiet in the car with a few exceptions. I’m not sure how we got to the topic of faith, but Brett mentioned that faith in God and His leading would always have some doubt because we just can’t know for certainty what the future holds and you can’t prove for certain that God exists. I think I agreed with some mundane comment like, “I suppose”. But, my thought was; “When does our faith become bigger than we are?” When do we run free in God’s grace and believe He truly does have our best interests in mind?” That’s how I picture big faith. Faith that always believes and always receives the best. A faith that is exciting even in the mundane. Maybe I can’t always know what that is, but I can know that I am with God and because of that I can see the rain from the thunderstorm as the water of life that helps to grow my spiritual experience.
At what point in time does our faith become bigger than we are? Maybe it happens when we stop looking to ourselves and what we can accomplish and look to God and what He can do. I can’t turn water into wine, but He can. I can’t raise the dead to life, but He can. I can’t forgive, but He can. I can’t apply mud to the eyes of the blind and then they see, but He can. I can’t part the Red Sea, but He can. I can’t provide complete peace for my soul, but He can.
Imagine walking around entirely blind. I can’t walk very confidently blind by myself, but when I hold onto someones hand who I know will take me to all the best places then I can walk confidently even when I can’t see where I’m going. I just trust they will help me cross the street when there are no cars to hit me.
If I were a parent with a blind child that I devoted my life to taking all the places that were best for them and they trusted that every place I was taking them was good even when they didn’t want to go, well just imagine! As a parent I like to think I will do and want only what is best for my children. In reality, I know my parenting skills aren’t perfect.
God is my father. He’s my dad. My parent with the perfect parenting skills. Wow. Why won’t I believe He will only take me to the best places if I walk blindly by faith with Him? When I follow someone other than God, it’s like the blind leading the blind. I hate to admit it, but I’ve certainly tried to live my life with God behind me rather than in front of me a few too many times. It makes no sense does it, to rush blindly into life while I try to drag God along behind me. But, as a human, pride leads me to believe I should have my own way. Unfortunately while I rush ahead in my own plans I can’t see the unhappiness it brings in the long-term. I am temporarily trading immediate satisfaction for long-term fulfillment. God’s plan on the other hand usually has me going through some great, albeit not so fun, learning experiences before I get to the everlasting joy stuff.
I challenge you this year to commit to a New Year of living not by sight, but by big faith. May our Father lead us every step of each day this next year.
